My, my, what a surprising Christmas tree Madge has decorated this year. She says it is a white cedar and was swiped from the same boardwalk at the APA Visitors Center, right next to the cute little gem she showed last time.
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Holly berries, anyone? Well, not really, it is Hortense Hardlump's cascade cotoneaster, but it does have pretty red berries of the season.
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This planting is one of the treasures of Countess Olga, a saikei that she claims represents a true depiction of the wild orchard behind her estate in Zgredonia. The church ruin looks a little too German to me - I would expect onion domes from northern Russia, but it is on the coast and the tower top is blown off anyway. She planted it with dwarf thyme cotoneaster.
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Upcoming events:
- December 11:
Caroling at the Wadams Free Library. Bring your opera scores, ladies. Our hostess, the outstanding hortidesign entertainer, Amy Ivy III, claims the new windows can withstand a hurricane. Let us challenge her with a plethora of high notes as we cheerfully sing our bouncy celebration songs from the Swedenborg Hymnal, followed by a blast of the complete Wagnerian Wakure Rock scene. If there are a lot of you, we can double up on warrior woman parts. I will again sing the role of Wotan since I have the most authoritative voice. During our many snack breaks, featuring Lithuanian bacon cookies, we can compare end-of-year bonsai contemplations over hot eggnog spiced with our own Viking beer. Come at 8PM and leave whenever the windows are blown out.
- December 24:
Jolly Christmas Eve Banquet and solstice bonsai wiring seminar. On the eve of anticipation, we gather at the Elizabethtown Regency Motel Ballroom for a meal fit for queens. As usual, the Haughty Triumverate will outdo themselves with a menu including boiled goose, Beef Grendel, five different varieties of potatoes, and exquisite sherry-chocolate pie for dessert. Between the many courses of foods and wines, we will demonstrate to one another our wiring prowess or weakness on bonsai that died over the difficult summer, sharing tips and toasts together. At midnight, we will greet our savior with an abbreviated version of Handel's Messiah. The Reverend Lois Lumpquist will dedicate the chorus, providing that she can get off the floor this year.
- January 1:
Mid-winter bonsai seed planting contest and Y2K observance. Come at 6 PM to Gisilde's farm in Reber for an exciting deep-freeze event. We will enjoy a delicious dinner of Russian survival food, complete with the vodka, and then get on with serious work. Our seeds this year are imported from the finest of domestic bonsai nurseries in Washington, Pennsylvania, our own state, and Massachusetts. They include such exotic Japanese varieties as sugar maple, blue spruce, black gum, bald cypress, and creosote bush. Bring lots of bonsai pots - a masterpiece may be in the making. Sherry is courtesy of the Sisterhood of Fragility tonight. We will close with a short songfest of prophetic gloom 'n doom songs. Bring flashlights and lanterns if the juice is off. Bring them anyway!
- February 15:
Midnight vigil, pruning event, and turkey shoot at the Saranac Lodge. Come at 8PM for a potpouring of entertaining events. While we reverently await the midnight moment when Saint Clotilde, then just Clotty, fell off the dock after a vision of Bishop Yoshimura pruning the bonsai of the holy grail, we will entertain ourselves with hot sherry cider and committee planning. Hilde will be our watchwoman and when the turkeys gather behind the closed down lodge, we will swoop down on them yelling our hi-o-to-hos, already well rehearsed at our caroling event. As time permits, we will also be pruning lodge shrubbery into elegant bonsai shapes in the dark, since Jack and Betty are in Alabama this time of year and no one will be around to object. Bring your ice skates if the lake is frozen in front of the lodge. And bring enough ammo this time.
- April 8:
Marathon workshop. We all could improve our bonsai skills so come to the Flabitov Spa at 7AM for an exciting day of bonsai artistry. Our skilled and brilliant workshop leader will be Marten Largenberg who will supply us with large, collected pitch pines (why can't we rip off our own and save a few bucks)? He will also introduce us to imported sherry from the Delaware valley. Lunch and dinner will be provided by Chez Griese in Lewis. If we have time, we can plant summer bulbs along the banks of the Boquet. Get it girls? Boquets on the Boquet? Amelia Aerblatter will be workshop monitor and sherry warden.
- May 15:
Spring will be celebrated with the launching of the Grim Ripper on Lake Champlaign, this year without the brick cooking-works. Countess Olga has bought us an alloy ox roasting grill that should not weigh so heavy in the water. Come to Medgar's Marina at 9:15 for the launching, sherry salute, and Viking Hymn sing. Club officers will tell you about our devious summer plans and then take the barge out for a shakedown cruise.
Past Events:
- Barge Repair:
Thanks to all you wonderful warwomen who helped repair the Grim Ripper, remove its brickworks, and paint its ramming bow. The space alien motiff was the idea of Noralgia Numquist and was a howling success - it scared the pants off of two effete, touristy looking men from Montreal.
- Nature Walk:
Nature's repast is always a blast when the sherry is pouring and friends are not boring. Of course, our guest lecturer didn't show but the sunshine did. Special thanks to Hattie for the scrapple cakes. Better than Campbell's soups.
- Labor Day Gala:
And nature's a bear when we have to stare at rain again! But we enjoyed the day anyway while our charming lecturer switched topics and entertained us royally with the biblioclassification of slime molds. Many thanks to Fanny for the spur of the moment use of the Flabitov spa and to Tilde for her yummy deep fried veggies. Beattrice won the bonsai Sauerkraut contest this year with all judges applauding her clever inclusion of salted herring.
- Wiring Workshop:
Oh well, what can you say. Count Vasilye turned out to be a bigger flake than we thought. His wire was unbendable! Fortunately, we stopped attempting before all our precious plants were totally destroyed. We bumped the bum right off of Olga's boathouse balcony. But special thanks to Ludmilla for providing the outstanding re-fried potato chips, the sherry, and entertainment for Olga's three new dwarf Dobermans who did not behave at all well. We hope her scars heal soon.
- Bonsai Raffle:
Shame on you girls for bringing such scraps for the raffle. How are we to make any money from such unworthy items as a brand new planting of Grand Union onions, root over driveway stones or dead nursery stock with wild clematis vines twirled around it? Next time bring something of value, like a stringer of trout or a hind of moose.
Club Elections:
Elections went well - everyone nominated was elected.
Thanksgiving banquet:
It hasn't happened yet but we are all drooling in anticipation. Remember, gals, a two day fast prior to the event is obligatory!!! And no sherry, either!!!!!
WE WISH YOU ALL A VERY MERRY SHERRY CHRISTMAS AND A BALEFUL Y2K!
Remember, girls, always pack your collecting tools on your snowblower - you never know what gems you might uncover!
Contact US?
No, we don't want any trashy e-mail. Send your formal, hand written inquiries to:
Boquet Bonsai Club
RD1 Box 328
Essex, NY 12936
Missed the boat? Read our last newletter.
Or the one before that.
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